Alright, Sophie, just walk to class like normal. Confident. Cool. Collected. You got this.
(THUD!)
Wait… what was that?
(She takes a step back, then tries moving forward again—another soft thud.)
No. No way. This is NOT happening.
(She glances around—empty hallway, thank god.)
Okay, maybe if I just… (steps back, then forward—thud.) Nope. Still stuck. My boobs are literally wedged in the hallway. How is this my life?
(Deep breath.) Alright, stay calm. Maybe I can shimmy out? (wiggles side to side) Oh great, now I’m just jiggling like a human Jell-O mold. Super helpful, Sophie.
(She exhales dramatically, slumping her shoulders.)
Do I call for help? No, absolutely not. “Hey, can someone come pry my boobs out of this hallway?” Yeah, that’ll go great.
(Pause.)
…Okay but seriously, how do I get out of here?
